How to photograph a Malamute

TxMals:
We all know that our dogs are the most beautiful in the world. Then why is it so hard to get a good picture?? I have more shots of Mallie rear ends or of a Mallie tongue licking the lens than I know what to do with ...

Here is a variation on the professional photographer's advice on how to photograph a puppy -- adjusted for Mallies!

cheers
connie

*Have Mallie professionally groomed.
*Take out second mortgage on home.
*Remove memory chip from plastic and insert in camera.
*Stanch blood flow from plastic packaging and call carpet cleaning service.
*Remove packaging material from Mallie's mouth and throw in trash.
*Remove Mallie from trash and brush coffee grounds from front end.
*Discover that Vetrap works well on wrist sprained removing bone from Mallie's mouth.
*Discover that your battery is low and postpone shoot.
>recharge battery and self-confidence<
*Successfully pull battery charger back out of Mallie's esophagus.
*Choose a suitable background for photo.
*Discard suitable background after Mallie lifts leg on it. Call carpet cleaning service again.
*Mount camera on tripod and focus.
*Find Mallie and take dirty sock from mouth.
*Re-groom Mallie to remove random tufts of undercoat suddenly sprouting everywhere.
*Place Mallie in pre-focused spot, say "Mallie, STAY" in a commanding voice and return to camera.
*Attempt to persuade Mallie to display other than rear end to camera.
*Sprint after escaping Mallie and beg to return.
*Place Mallie using barbecue chicken, the neighborhood kids, and industrial-strength tie-downs.
*Call kids' parents to apologize, offer to pay hospital bills.
*Set focus while fending off Mallie's friendly advances.
*Remove tripod from between Mallie's teeth.
*Get tissue and clean nose prints from lens.
*Get towel and remove Mallie tongue slime.
*Threaten spouse with violence for laughing.
*Put cat outside and put peroxide on the scratches on Mallie's nose.
*Put magazines back on coffee table. Discard shattered antiques.
*Promise to buy spouse a new TV.
*Try to get Mallie's attention by squeaking toy over your head.
*Duct-tape your glasses and check camera for damage.
*Jump up in time to grab Mallie and say, "No, outside! No, outside!"
*Call carpet cleaning service again.
*Fix a drink.
*Sit back in Lazy Boy with drink, pop in a DVD of "White Fang" (the TV show) and resolve to teach Mallie "sit" and "stay."
*DECIDE TO CALL PROFESSIONAL PHOTOGRAPHERS FIRST THING IN THE MORNING.